Warmer weather means our kids spend as much time outside as possible...dragging every toy and plaything out of the garage with them. Seriously...EV.RY.THING! They'll dump out buckets and bins, tie jump-ropes to anything that sits still long enough, and arrange all sorts of garagey items out on the patio and picnic table playing all sorts of heaven-knows-what. I love it...LOVE that they're using their noggins for a little imaginative play.

I had to laugh outloud though when I peared out the kitchen window to check up on them, and found this...our blessed Mother was apparently in on their shananigans.

HA! (Yes, that's a spiderman rod-n-reel she's toting.)

Only during Lent...
Our Lady of the Fish-Fry, pray for us.

more of Frank's genius

"Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day.
Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime."
~unknown

Teach a man to squeegie the shower doors, and you've got one happy mama.
(You can quote me on that.)

Mama loves you Frankie-boy!

diaper bags.

I always felt that carrying a diaper bag on my shoulder made me feel...well, younger. Despite the fact that I'm pushing 40 this year, somehow a diaper bag helped me relate to those new mommas...first-timer, 20 somethings. Never mind that I have 10 others out of diapers by now. Still. Diaper bag in my mind helps me feel well, younger.
Younger that is, until I'm toting it (and all 11 kids) to my 12 year old's rockin girl-band concert ("Chatterbox" LIVE on stage at the New Bremen bowling alley!)

It felt wrong to walk out the door with all the kids in tow and say "Alice, don't forget your guitar. John, I've got the diaper bag."

My first "rock concert" with a diaper bag. Seriously. Crazy. And feelin well, old.

This is NOT how we geared up for Van Halen in the early 90's.


Here's Alice and her band-mates prior to taking the stage...
And the girls rockin' the house...

Remember you are dust, and to dust you shall return.

(a little post-Ashes humor.)

Today little Annie broke thru the plastic barrier that is separating our kitchen from the drywall mud/dust renovation beyond. She delighted in the fact that I hollared out her name, and giggled over her shoulder at me as I proceeded to make chase. I caught her seconds too late...just after she dove into the piles of dust and proceeded to make dust-angels on her belly. She laughed outloud then as she rolled over onto her back with a toe-point and an arched back...quite pleased with her efforts. I couldn't help but laugh out loud too...until she started licking the dust off the floor making a paste on her tongue. Ewwww....

I should have just taken her to mass with us for ashes on her forehead.

Seriously Anne.

date night.

John and I managed to sneak out of the house unattended last evening. What a rare treat. Times are changing, and kids are growing so that we're able to get out for brief intervals for things that require the both of us. (We rarely go on "dates," these brief outings are usually matters of practicality.)
This time was no different. The school kids had all attended mass in the morning with their classmates, leaving John and I the only ones needing to get to church yet. We left a few minutes early and stopped by our local decorating store to choose flooring for the "apartment" as well. (*Side note: we're not sure if/when we'll ever stop calling that new space "the apartment." Hopefully someday it will be "family room"...but not yet...it doesn't sound right, yet.)
Anyhow, in just 20 minutes we had linoleum and carpeting chosen, thanks to a really great saleslady who showed us just the right stuff...durable, stain-resistant, and in the perfect shade of "dirt." Oh, and budget-friendly. Sweet. Sign us up.

We made it to mass just in time to find a seat...the place was packed. Awesome!

What a gift it is to attend mass as a couple. Truly a gift. Don't get me wrong...I love when our entire family sits together, over-filling an entire pew...all of us present for the Lord. But sitting with John, just the two of us...well, it's a beautiful reminder of how it all started. I couldn't help but think of our early years when we were dating, and first married, and had all sorts of dreams and plans and hopes mapped out for our future. And we'd bring them to God in prayer. And here we were, holding hands at mass again...just the two of us...no eye-rolling, or pinching or flicking or asking "how many more songs?" or climbing over pews (Johns's so well behaved when the kids aren't around.) This time with the knowledge and understanding of God's total love, and mercy, and providence. And how when we make room for him as the center of our marriage covenant, at the center of our families, first in our hearts...everything else falls into line. Maybe not as we'd mapped out...but certainly far greater than anything we could have hoped for. All is good and right.
It was a perfect way to start Lent I think. With that reminder to keep Christ at the center. To take time to look away for a moment at what we think we want/need, and reflect and listen to what Christ may be calling us to...first and foremost a closer relationship with Him.

A perfect date-night indeed.

Oh, and I'm pretty stoked about the new flooring too. It could be installed as early as next week already!! Woohooo! God is gooooood.

Ashes, Ashes.

We all fall down...this time, in prayer.
I was pleasantly surprised when some of the kids asked if we could restart family rosary times for Lent. Awesome! (and here, I thought they HATED family rosary...what with the occasional eye-rolling and moaning, it was hard to tell.)

But they asked, and so they shall recieve. Wednesdays and Sundays-family rosary. Fridays-Way of the Cross.


Anyways, as always, my kids never cease to amaze/inspire me. When I just stop for a minute thinking I got it all figured out, and listen to their little-God-like voices.
Just get over yourself Jamie.

It's a new day...

I've posted this before, but I still love it's simple reminder of self-transformation at Lent...and always...

Fast from judging others; feast on Christ in them.
Fast from wanting
more; feast on being thankful.
Fast from anger; feast on patience.
Fast from worry; feast on trust.
Fast from complaining; feast on enjoyment.
Fast from negatives; feast on postitives.
Fast from stress; feast on
prayer.
Fast from anger; feast on forgiveness.
Fast from self-concern; feast on compassion for others.
Fast from fear; feast on truth
Fast from
discouragement; feast on hope.
Fast from gossip; feast on silence.
Fast
from fighting; feast on peace.
Amen
~Adapted from a Lenten prayer by
William Arthur Ward in Take Out, Family Faith on the Go

Fat Tuesday

We're contemplating the journey called Lent, here.

That is, we're eating cake, and watching tv, and sucking up all the things we plan to do without for the next 40 days. It's like a last-minute "fix" before the long haul.

Tomorrow over breakfast we'll pen a list of final Lenten promises. Not so much to dwell in it, but so that I can keep track...of who can eat today's leftover chocolate cake, and who can have computer time, etc. Far be it for me to tempt anyone into failure. Heaven's no.

The kids asked me this evening what I'm "giving up." I'm still not sure. God seems to be telling me to give up "holding in." I've been a bottled up mess of thoughts and stories and ideas...revelations and opportunities, and all sorts of just "stuff" filling up my head. I've been very restless lately, and feeling too busy to do any sort of writing. But these last days, it's as if I can't hold it in anymore, and God seems to be telling me just to let it go.
So one of my Lenten commitments is to quit holding back. To write every day, even if it seems trivial. I feel a physical~spiritual connectedness to each one of you...we need each other...that is, I need you all. God knows it, and he's encouraging me to reach out...to accept each of you, individually and as a whole, and the outstretched hand you offer each time you check in to read about my little corner of the world. He reminds me that none of us are in this alone. None of us are perfect. None of us are meant to be super-woman, super-mom, super-anything. Just meant to be faithful. And to hold each other up.
So to start these 40 days, I commit to be faithful. To continue to write. To share and to know that you're out there, lifting me up.
God is so good.
Prayers being offered that we may all have a transformative Lent...one that brings each of us closer to Jesus and the supreme love He has for each one of us.


And God was speaking outloud through little John tonight. We were discussing ways he could earn money to donate to the kids' Parish Lenten Mission project. Monies are being collected to help some Precious Blood Priests in Chicago who have set up a safe house for kids there. They're trying to raise money for a van to help transport kids safely through the bad neighborhoods.
Anyhow, John mumbled..."Mom, I"m gonna find ways to surprise you over these next 40 days...to earn the money. It would just be awesome to get enough so they could buy 2 vans!"

Yes, John. It would be awesome. And that's exactly how God must think...full of surprises, and better than we could expect/imagine.

Blessings to you all this Lenten season.

What the world needs now...

is love, sweet love.


Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

1 Corinthians 13: 4-7

Happy Valentines Day!

you can imagine their surprise

Scissors and Sharpie markers...two things that are pretty much under lock and key here. Or at least require a signed permission slip and 2 forms of i.d.

There have been too many near misses...haircuts, marked furniture, injury, etc.

You can imagine their surprise then, when I handed over a whole box of Sharpies and crayons and told them to "have at it."

The kitchen wall was a free-for-all.

And they handled it beautifully.

Couldn't be prouder of their team work to pull this off...






Two more days till this wall disappears forever...

I love Dory.

"just keep swimmin, just keep swimmin, swimmin, swimmin."

It's my montra these days.

In this crazy sea of every-day-life, where the rivers of home renovations and prior commitments converge...I'll just keep swimmin.
Today I find myself wearing yoga pants that I slept in last night. Splash of deoderant, a clean shirt and some water to tame the bed-head and I'm good. It's the best I can muster this morning...day three of work-crews here by 7:30 am. Seriously 7:30. I'm usually in pj's well past 10. I need to focus my energy to answer such daunting questions as "Mom, where's my Ninjago-Lego dude?" and "Mom, can I have gum?" (before breakfast?!) Those are the easy ones...the questions my brain has been fielding for a dozen years now. There are new questions these days though...stumpers...questions that have me scratching my head in wonder...like, "How many recessed lights would you like in the family room?" and "Where would you like the switches for those?" or "What color vanity top would you like in your bathroom?" Seriouly...I went through a whole box of marble chip samples only to learn that NONE of them have mint green flecks?! How is this progress?! Nobody's thought to create a bathroom vanity that camoflauges toothpaste spittings?! Oi. Guess we'll go with beige. Whatever. As for switches...a single master switch near my bed would be fine...ON in the morning, OFF at night. Really...nobody else bothers with turning lights off in this house anyway...it looks like a party in every room at least 10 hours of every day.
These questions should not be difficult. Really. But they are. Just more wonderful things to think about at night as I lie in bed trying to solve the problems of my little world. Not really problems at all when I remember to thank God for these blessings, and realize just how truly good he's been to us here. No room for complaints, or concerns. It will all come together in the end, I know.
Truth is, it's quite exciting...VERY exciting to see the progress at the end of each day. Also exciting to realize I likely won't clean house for several weeks...it's just not worth trying to keep up with all that dust. No house-cleaning=more play time, more reading time, more puzzle time, more time to find that darn Ninjago-Lego dude, and fold that crazy laundry. Yes. Life goes on.
And I'll just keep swimmin.

sweat equity

Even the kids found ways to contribute to this project.

Our (former apartment) new family room remodel:

Phase 1: Demo. (check.)

We spent this past weekend readying the space by clearing it of everything. No more carpet, no more cabinets, or appliances, or plumbing fixtures. Shoot...no more walls, no more ceiling tiles. Even the electrical wires were pulled to make way for a completely new open floor plan...an extension of our kitchen, an added bathroom, and a family great room.

My dad and brother along with John did the largest part of the labor, but the older kids sure did their share as well. Alice, Emma and Sam helped with hammers, and hauling, and even hours on step ladders pulling the staples left overhead after the ceiling tiles were stripped away. I was never more proud of their hard work.

In another week or so, contracters will be coming in to remove a couple walls between our kitchen and this unused space...and the room will blossom from there.

I've not decided if I'll post pictures as the work progresses or just tease you with a couple "before" shots, and a final "after"...and then backtrack. Guess we'll just have to wait and see.

Here are Lucy, Mary & Grace showing the kitchen wall "before." That wooden door down the hallway on the right is currently our only access to the apartment space. For now.
Here Alice and Grace are dodging dust and debris in the completely gutted apartment space. In this photo, I'm standing on the backside of the wall I just showed looking across the space, toward the street. Things will look different very soon. (and I couldn't be more tickled.)

random acts of kindness

The weekend brought snow to these parts. Unfortunately, the rain that came through last night washed it all away just as quickly. While it was here though, we made the most of it. The kids spent a large part of Saturday outdoors building forts, clearing sidewalks, engaging in snowball battles, and the best...building a snow family in our front yard for all the passers-by to see. It took them the whole day, in shifts, to develop the ideas and finally build each member...dad, mom, a child playing in a pile of snowballs, even a snow-puppy whose tail wags in the breeze. Very cute indeed. All the while, those "on break" warming indoors to hot cocoa (coffee for me) would supervise from the snuggly comfort of the couch in the front window. It was great. A real team effort. Well, except for me and Anne. We just kept hot cocoa on the stove, and enjoyed the mostly quiet afternoon. (Laundry kept me plenty busy during her nap time.)

Dark came too soon, and I had to beg them all inside, assuring them there would be snow left on Sunday for another day of play.
Just as the last ones stripped off their snow clothes and settled inside, waiting out supper...the doorbell rang. None of us recognized the kind stranger at the door (I apologize if I should have...I'm terrible that way.)
Turns out, someone driving by saw the kids hard at work finishing the snow-family, and enjoyed the view. Enjoyed it enough in fact to be moved to stop by the grocery and pick us up a little treat. This kind lady on our front stoop, thanked the kiddos for their hard work, and handed over a grocery bag of 'smores fixins. Just like that. Random kindness.

I thanked her as she walked away, with a "thank you" that seemed way to insignificant for the trouble she'd just gone to. Sometimes I get so caught up in myself, and my little world to forget how simple, and powerful a little kindness can be. AWESOME! And the coolest is that the kids really got it...they couldn't say enough about the "cool" lady that stopped by.

In fact at dinner later (the one none of the kids ate much of, cause they were too full of 'smores and hot cocoa...and I was cool with that) we went around the table sharing the day's "Best" (an opportunity for everyone to speak about the best thing that happened that day) They were all in agreement that the BEST thing was that a total stranger would do something so nice. Me too. That is the BEST. And such a simple lesson for us all (especially me) about doing little things with love...and how it leaves us better for it...the giver and the reciever. So cool.

That kind lady with 'smores...she was God's hand in that moment.
And God is good (and apparently enjoys snowfamilies, and teamwork too.)
Thank you for reaching out to us in such a fun unexpected way.

Here's our snow family reaching out their hands in a friendly hello, and "thank you!"

ancient chinese secrets...debunked

A few of us ordered Chinese take-out Sunday night. (Yummm. HUGE treat.) Only a few of the older ones care for it, so it's a relatively inexpensive meal, while the younger ones nibble on baked chicken nuggets or some other "favorite" from home.

Anyhow, Rose opened one of the fortune cookies and asked me to read...

"Ignorance never settles a question."

Charlie was quick with a "What the heck does that mean?" and before I could muster some nonsense response (cause I really had no clue,) Rose saved me.

"It means, that's a DUMB fortune."

There. Settled.
Confusious might say that's one genious 5 year old. I'd agree.

obedience

It's my word.

Pam over at Roamin Catholic Mom challenged her blog readers to find their "word" for the New Year...a montra, or theme, or thought to ponder/consider. Sort of resolution word.

Mine's easy. Obedience. And already being challenged. Big time.

You see, I've been praying since early December for some clarity in the New Year. Clarity to hear God's call, to recognize it, and more importantly to answer with a resounding "Yes." His joy being my strength and all, I want to please Him. And in doing so, recognize that if He's happy, I'm happy and back and forth. Sounds simple enough, right?

Till he comes calling...

And then I want to say..."is that really you, Lord? Or just a wrong-number? Cause, this doesn't sound like something you really want me to say yes to. Does it? Or does it. Oh Lord, how bout Maybe. Are you okay with maybe? Or how bout Next time. Or Not this thing, but the next thing, I'll for sure say yes then. I promise. Seriously. This doesn't seem like my thing...

Obedience. Ugggh. I stink at that.

The readings all last week weren't much help, either. (Thanks a lot God! You know how to nudge my heart just so, don't ya. Darnit.)

This song at mass on Sunday put me over the edge...oh, He's gooooood.


The Summons

Will you come and follow me if I but call your name?
Will you go where you don't know and never be the same?
Will you let my love be shown? Will you let my name be known,
will you let my life be grown in you and you in me?

Will you leave yourself behind if I but call your name?
Will you care for cruel and kind and never be the same?
Will you risk the hostile stare should your life attract or scare?
Will you let me answer prayer in you and you in me?

Will you let the blinded see if I but call your name?
Will you set the prisoners free and never be the same?
Will you kiss the leper clean and do such as this unseen,
and admit to what I mean in you and you in me?

Will you love the "you" you hide if I but call your name?
Will you quell the fear inside and never be the same?
Will you use the faith you've found to reshape the world around,
through my sight and touch and sound in you and you in me?

Lord your summons echoes true when you but call my name.
Let me turn and follow you and never be the same.
In Your company I'll go where Your love and footsteps show.
Thus I'll move and live and grow in you and you in me.

So after a lot of ignoring, and him-hawing, and procrastinating, I gave a reluctant Yes. And now, giggling a little bit, cause hubby's involved in this too. We were asked to speak as a couple at an upcoming marriage retreat. He's reluctant too, but we both commented after mass Sunday that God's pretty clear about what he wants.
Somehow it seems easier to speak about the whole mom and chaos and kids topic, but sharing about our marriage, well...that's a whole 'nother ballgame.
One that's sure to inspire some good conversation and reflection as a couple as we prepare.
Shoot. Maybe that's okay.
Maybe, well maybe the Good Lord knows what he's up to afterall.

Speak Lord, I'm listening. I want to do your will...not? Yes, Jamie. Yes you do.

and his droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow

Droll...d-r-o-l-e...(ding) That is incorrect.

The book she's had memorized word for word since the age of three ('Twas the Night Before Christmas)...and it was a simple, strange word that caught her up in the fifth round of the school spelling bee.

Darnit.

What the heck does "droll" mean, anyway?! It means she won't be going on the the county bee.

Still incredibly proud Emma! Way to represent!

Frank-the story teller.

I'd be a lying fool to tell you that our kids don't fight and bicker and argue and annoy the heck out of each other...often. They are brothers and sisters after all. One of my biggest pet peaves right now is the way any two of them can go on forever with Nuh-uh, yuh-huh, Nuh-uh, Yuh-huh business. Seriously! Someone just end it already!

But a weeks' worth of those drive-me-nuts--God-grant-me-patience--we-can-get-thru-this-together--Mom's-gonna-lose-it! moments, can be cancelled out with a single moment like this...
Frank barreled down the stairs the other morning, just as the older kids were gearing up for their walk to school. He was all fired up and excited about the dream he'd just awoken from, and wanted to share the good news that he'd "won first prize in a contest for a brand new Nerf Stampede ECS" (the coolest in Nerf's arsenal). He's been wanting one for awhile, and was so ecstatic by his dream, that even though he seemed aware it was only a dream, the joy it gave him was enough to last the whole day. And the big kids recognized this, and dropped everything while they gathered around to hear his story. It was awesome. I couldn't have begged them to do something this kind...but sometimes they just get it. They get the joy, and the need for attention, and know how to pull together when they should. Totally awesome. All eyes on Frank as he recalled his First Prize dream.
Made my little heart all warm and fuzzy and full again...seriously...yuh-huh!

Thank you God for these moments...to get me thru the others.

Christmas Wrap

--of birthday bashes, christmas chaos, and seasons smooching. Yes, I mean mistletoe!
I love Christmas! I enjoy advent, and the waiting & anticipating, and surprise planning, and sneaky-wrapping, and all that comes with the prep-work. But I LOVE Christmas! The big show. I love the family time, and the laughter, and the letting loose after weeks of well, hard-work, and the food, and the family time, and the laughter, and the music, and silliness, and even whiney kids all hopped up on too much chocolate and sugar, and even POP! Yes, Christmas means the older kids get soda. Wooohoooo!
I love that at our house Christmas lasts a full 12 days...and sometimes longer. Seriously. It's just that good. And by the time that first day of school rolls back around, it's darn hard to crawl out of bed. But being back in some sort of routine is good for us too. Sort of. Okay, yes it's good.
Anyways, since I've really slacked at telling you all about our 12 days of Christmas I thought I'd summarize with a few pics and thoughts.

Of course there are birthdays to celebrate. (Jesus...obviously.)

But then we've got a few here too.

Like Lucy... (okay, she's before Christmas, but I need to give her equal time)


And Sam, who turned 11 on the 28th. (that's 3 11-year-olds in the house now)
And me. 29 on the 29th! (my lucky year) Of course no cake or pictures. But Emma did make brownies, and I got the best birthday party EVER. Even my kids would agree.

Oh, and January 6th...baby Grace turned NINE! Oh my. Not baby Grace anymore.
Yes that's an ice-cream cake...cause by this time of year, I'm over birthday-cake-baking.

Next week (the 16th) my oldest pair, Alice and Emma will turn 12. And then we've got a break from birthdays until February 11...when we clebrate the gifts of John and Mary. Whew!

Okay...so moving on. As if Christ isn't enough reason to celebrate.

We also spent a few days hanging out with cousins over the Christmas break. Moms and dads visiting, and laughing, and eating, and story-telling (occasionally sitting in on a random card game or tiny tea-party, or joining in an impromtu karaoke show in the "quiet" room. Ha!) All the while kids doing what kids do best...playing hard...making memories with cousins...playing hide-n-seek, and games, and Nerf wars, and dance/karaoke parties, and even a sleep-over. (That was on my birthday!) Yes, we had 23 people sleeping under this roof for my birthday...only 3 adults and the other 20 ranging from ages 1-14. It was totally AWESOME!!! And, I should mention, that when I woke up the next morning to a quiet house, and sipped my coffee in the sitting room, no one ever would have guessed there were that many people sleeping in! I felt so incredibly blessed in those moments. For our family, immediate & extended, and for our home, and for all the goodness God brings into our lives. My heart was full. (and luckily so was my fridge!) They all woke up hungry, and I was tickled to death welcome them all around the table.

My niece and her long-time beau got engaged for Christmas! More celebrating! They live in Knoxville, TN. Although he is a native Canadian..."french Canadian!" my kids are quick to tell everyone. They spent Christmas with his family in Montreal, and then joined us after the first of the year for a couple days to visit, and what else? celebrate! More card-games, and laughter, and family times, and of course good food! We could listen to J.F. talk all night with his french accent...we're simple that way. I think he could be telling us that we have bad breath, and stinky feet and it would still sound beautiful. The kids love asking him to translate everything into french. Pretty sure he was ready to hit the road after a couple days...though they've visited before, and they've managed to stay together. Our family is a test for relationships that way...he still seems anxious to get married, and wants kids. We think he's a keeper! Conratulations Jenna!

Anne was a treasure this Christmas...at that stage where real joy comes in the paper and boxes. And most of her time at parties was spent doing just that. Running through the paper and squealing with delight. (or mooching for treats at the food table...she was on a 12 day sugar buzz I'm sure!) I tried desperately to pin her down for photos...I stink at that...here's what I got...

Yep. Dear Santa...next year I'd love a camera that doesn't have a 9 minute delay...I'm just sayin'
I'll try to be good.

Well...mostly good.

Can't be good all the time...not with this around...

Merry Kiss-mas! (I mean...Merry Christmas everyone!)

Ozzy.

Not this one...

But this one...



A few Christmas' back, I spotted this adorable little Elf on the clearance sales at our local Hallmark store. I fell in love instantly. Not because I read the box, and understood that this was a "magical" scout elf from the North Pole. No. Definitely NO! If I'd read the box, I might have put it back on the shelf. I fell in love for purely nostalgic reasons...my grandparents had one exactly like him that they hung over the doorway to their kitchen every Christmas. Yes...Christmas at Grandma's...and Bing Crosby, and dancing, and card games, and hard tack candy and chocolates of every possible kind all spread out on colorful plastic trays on the coffee table...within kids reach. This elf brought the memories flooding back in...so I bought it immediately.
And then I got home and read the book...and the "strings attached." And at first it sounded fun. He arrives at our house each season with St. Nicholas (Dec. 6th) and leaves again with Santa on Christmas eve. In the meantime his job is to keep an eye on the kiddos and report back to Santa each night. (He's a flying, spying magical elf, you know.) After a night of flying north and back, he lands at the house, in a different location each morning for the kids to find him, and be mindful. (right.) Sometimes he plays pranks thru the night. Sometimes he likes where he's at and doesn't move for several nights (if mom forgets.)
Truly, some nights it's fun and silly, and makes me feel like a kid dreaming/scheming up little pranks or places for the kids to find him in the morning. But mostly, it's become one more thing that demands energy from me at the holidays...not good energy...not focused on Jesus-energy. And I forget sometimes to remember about Christmas at Grandma and Grandpa's when I see him, cause I'm forcing myself to remember to just move the darn thing somewhere else before I go to bed.
Alice and Emma helped me with the scheming this year...and on his last night with us...before catching the sleighride with Santa...he threw us one wing-dinger of an Elf-surprise. He "elfed" our family room. Paper chains, tacky gold tinsel that we found in a bag of stuff from a house-warming prank years back, colored lights and paper snowflakes...a kids christmas wonderland. It was a fun farewell...

And it's more fun now that the older kids can help in the surprise and fun for the younger ones. But I have to say (scrooge that I am) I'm really looking forward to the year I can just pull him out of the box and set him in the doorway to my kitchen, and let my grandkids "remember" songs and dancing, and cardplaying, and christmas treats within easy reach...a silly elf bringing smiles and happy christmas memories of grandma and grandpa's house.

“These are days you’ll remember
Never before and never since, I promise
Will the whole world be warm as this
And as you feel it,
You’ll know it’s true
That you are blessed and lucky.”
~lyrics, "These are Days" by 10,000 Maniacs

I borrowed these lyrics to paste into my Christmas letter this year. Simple words that manage to sum up my feelings for where we're at in life right now. One of my favorite songs from---shoot---many years ago, that somehow made their way back into my head recently.

We kicked off our days of Christmas on the Eve. We all (minus little Anne, who preferred to nap at Grandma & Grandpa's) attended 4:00 Children's Mass at our parish. Eight of our kids had "jobs" to do, ranging from singing in the choir (3 oldest girls) to dressing up in the Nativity play...4 Angels and a Dove to be exact. Sam and Lucy were the only ones in the pew with us, which somehow made me feel older, and lonelier...it was a strange mix of feelings at the realization that the day will come when there will be no little climbing toddlers or crying babies at Mass with us anymore. I didn't know whether to cheer or cry. I kinda missed the climbing babble...kinda.

Anyhow, it was a beautiful Mass, and I particulary enjoyed visiting the Manger scene afterwards with the kids and pointing out the various "players" (statues) in the real story of Christmas.

Afterwards we celebrated at my parents for their traditional Christmas Eve get-together. My brother and family from Tennessee weren't able to make it, but we talked on the phone briefly, and celebrated both Christmas, and his 40th birthday in his absence. We whooped it up good.
Dad likes to come up with Trivia games for the kids...their answers are sometimes priceless. I can't recall them now, but I know we giggled more than a couple times at their simple words of wisdom. Too cute.
We exchanged gifts, and played games, and ate good foods, and just enjoyed spending happy times together; adults grateful for each others' presence, kids grateful for well, presents.

~Our traditional pose in front of the tree...just after mass before sweaters and "stuffy church clothes" are ripped off, and just before diving into the food goodies. Say CHEESE!

on the 10th day of christmas...

Wow! Has it been nearly 2 weeks again, since I've posted?!

I hate that.

I mean, I love that our days have been so full...good full. Each day blessed, like a new gift to unwrap. Truly these have been the richest days of Christmas I've ever experienced. Maybe it comes with age...or wisdom...an increased understanding of God's great love...maybe I just have my eyes (and heart) open. Who knows. It's been a wonderful Christmas season thus far, with more treasures to come. It's gonna take me several posts to unravel exactly how we've spent our time since I've last written (Christmas Adam, I believe.)

I'll start with something from this morning though...very random...and completely unrelated to Christmas at all. Can't help it, that's how my mind works...randomly.

As I was wiping down the windows and glass doors in the kitchen this morning...God laughed. And sent me a "helper."

Ewwww....gross boogies, and drool mixed with tears. Had to set down the windex and towels to clean her up, and just love on her for a bit. 'Tis the season for runny noses, and babies needing extra snuggly time.

and the day rolls on.

We had peanut butter and jelly on BUNS for lunch. Because we're crazy like that...and it's Christmas Adam. Alongside Ramen noodles and apple wedges, we're pretty sure this is what the modern day Wisemen would have come bearing. Because it's just that good.

Oh, and we're (okay...only me...the kids cleared the room as soon as I started singing) jammin' out to this... one of my faves. Merry Christmas!

Christmas Adam.

(because, Adam comes right before Eve.)

So, we're all giddy, and excited...just two days till Christmas. We're all a little stir-crazy, thinking we should be doing something. Should we clean? Or do something special? Or what?! It's also "vacation" which means we really don't want to do anything "not fun."
So.
Here we are on Christmas Adam (our little name for the day before Christmas Eve), wondering what we should do. It's just 10am, and we've already colored up all the pictures we can possibly bare, and the boys have made a gazillion paper airplanes...which somehow, I LOVE/HATE all at the same time. I'm a little obsessive compulsive when it comes to paperscraps. They make me itch. But anyways. It's Christmas vacation, and I'm just pouring more cofffee, and enjoying the fact that everyone's getting along.
And I'm also scheming a little hour away for last minute "must haves" before all the parties forthcoming.
In general, this day feels much like the day before any scheduled birth. I know there are things that need done. And I'll do them. But I'm also aware that this day ahead means much more than just a day....and so I want to just sip coffee, and enjoy the moment. Relax. Things are about to change. Christ (this new baby) is coming, and it's gonna rock our world. And somehow, we hope, that we'll be changed in the process. That just like with our own new babies, we'll embrace this new Christ child, remember how easy it is to love an infant, and to want to do everything for it. Placing that child's needs before our own. Learning to say "yes" again with love. Because that's all this new baby needs, is for us to respond with a loving yes. That's it. LOVE. Yes.
What a great reminder it seems, as we celebrate each Christmas, that Christ our Saviour came into this world as a newborn. And how simple it is to love an infant. Somehow when I think of him grown-up, it becomes more difficult in my head to connect. But babies...well we all know how a baby can light up a whole room. A baby changes us. We accept, embrace, simply LOVE babies.
So today, I'm excited, and full of hope. And anxious to meet this new baby Jesus again. And while I'm certain to be busy, especially after dark when the duties of Christmas gifts and wrapping take over, today I'm going to soak it in.
This day of waiting...Christmas Adam.
I can feel my heart growing bigger already...always room for more LOVE.
Love this season of hope, this season where LOVE WINS.

just remembering

Sent my kiddos off to mass before school this morning. I remembered after they left that mass is being offered today for a very special lady that graced our lives , if only too briefly. Can't believe it's been 5 years since she passed so quickly, and tragically. Irene was a beautiful woman who brought joy and laughter into our family, and reminded us how to give of ourselves with great love. Alice has been asking for Zucchini Bread lately, I think I'll make it today. It's not Irene's special recipe, but whenever we make it we all think of her, and how generous she was with sharing her garden goodies. Her zucchini bread was the bomb...and her pumpkin cookies.

I wanted to add a nice picture of her...I have several. I couldn't find a single picture of her looking at the camera though. The sparkle and smile in the eyes of those around her in all them made it clear how special she was!

Missing you Irene. Pray for us from your certain special seat in Heaven.

(note: the other namesake of our Little "Lucy Irene.")

happy advent-ures.

Whew. What a weekend. We are soaking in the spirit of Christmas, big time.
Since St. Lucy we've been busy little beavers. Thursday brought a day of shopping, just my mom and me. Wonderful day of hustle-and-bustle through the malls...all for the sake of Santa. Friday a handful of us went Christmas caroling with Fr. Rick and a few other families. I had forgotten how much fun it was, and how much joy it seems to bring to the homes we visited. The true spirit of Christmas. Loved it! Saturday brought our first Christmas party of the season...my mom's family in St. Henry. Santa was there and brought gifts for all the kiddies...we ate like kings, and just truly enjoyed catching up. Love family. Anne was in rare form, just giddy and laughing as she ran among the big boys tossing a Nerf football across the hall. Her guardian angel was working overtime, with more than a few near-misses. There were aunts and uncles who wanted the football throwing to stop...but seriously...we've been doing that for all 38 years I've been attending! Wouldn't be Christmas without some small child getting tackled by a teenager going long.
Sunday was mass, and a nice quiet day at home, followed by the Christmas concert at church that evening with all 5 choirs performing. It was beautiful. BEAUTIFUL! Emma takes piano lessons from our choir director and was one of the students performing piano solo's prior to the start of the concert. She played the 12 Days of Christmas. I was beaming...so proud of her. And then she and Alice and Grace all sang later with the Children's choir. This was Grace's first year...she was "all that." The evening ended with the mixed choir singing "Oh holy night." Yes. It was. Holy. Inspiring. Beautiful. What a wonderful ministry the choirs and music department of our parish provides. Absolutely inspiring!
Tonight was bible study at my friend Stacie's. We read ahead to Luke's account of that Holy Night, and the angels, and the shepherd. And Mary "pondered all these things in her heart." We were right there with her for the moment, imagining and wondering and pondering it too. WHat a gift, indeed.
My Christmas shopping is nearly done...just the few last-minute things that seem never to be done. I did some baking today, just because I could, and the girls at home asked. It was nice. And not at all stressful. And I'm looking forward to this final week leading up to the Birthday party. Don't want to get lost in the cake and balloons and party streamers. I want to see His holy light when we all gather in to celebrate.
Feelin' like this past weekend has really set the pace, put our hearts in the right place to really recognize the gift of Him. We are so blessed, and grateful.
Hope you all are enjoying these last days of Advent. I'm looking forward again to those "quiet" days of Christmas with the kids home, and game-playing, and enjoying. Now if the rain would stop and give us another little dusting of snow...just a dusting.

St. Lucy, pray for us.

Yesterday (December 13th) we celebrated the Feast of St. Lucia (Lucy). We learned about her when I was expecting our 10th child, due this time of year. We did what we always do when we're considering baby names...consulted the the Catholic Calendar. There it was...Dec. 13th...Feast of St. Lucy. Loved the name instantly. We researched her a little more, and prayed to her...asking for her intercession for a healthy baby, and on December 18th little Lucy Irene came into our lives. Healthy, happy baby girl. And like her name sake, she instantly inspired us to let our Christ lights shine. ("Lucy" means light.) We hosted a bowling party/canned food drive with all of our playgroup family/friends in January after she was born for our local food pantry. She can't help but bring out the best in us. (Although she's three now, and tantrums happen...but still that little light is shining...and I'm optimistic about what FOUR will bring.)

Anyhow.

To celebrate St. Lucy's day, we baked (sort-of) traditional ring of bread. I didn't make the braided bread that I have in the past, but more of a quick-rise dough in a bundt pan, then smothered it with an orange glaze/icing, and craisins for color. There were candles, representing that light I mentioned. And we prayed before dinner...

Saint Lucy, you did not hide your light under a basket, but let it shine for the whole world, for all the centuries to see. We may not suffer torture in our lives the way you did, but we are still called to let the light of our Christianity illumine our daily lives. Please help us to have the courage to bring our Christianity into our work, our recreation, our relationships, our conversation -- every corner of our day. Amen


I had intended to take a picture of our lovely bread, warm and ooey gooey, right out of the oven with candles glowing...but well...we ate it just that quick! Here's a picture of our Little Lucy "helping" to make the frosting...

Christmas unscripted.

I like my Christmas traditions.
Well, most of them...or at least the idea of most of them.

Seriously? What do I like most about Christmas traditions? We have plenty of them...but what are my favorite? Hmmmmmmm....

Cool thing about being in this new home...all the rules can change. I'm feeling liberated this year by the fact that some of the things on our every-year-Christmas-to-do-list...have gone and went. No pressure. Oh, don't get me wrong...there's still decorating, and shopping, and party-planning. But some of things that I thought I enjoyed, were in fact some of the very things that were weighing me down...in particular, the baking. Lord knows I LOVE to bake and candy-make. But seriously...it was getting out of control.
No baking this year. None. Unless the kids have asked to make something in particular...and then we make it...and eat it. No saving for Christmas! We enjoy the fruits. Done.

I can't tell you what a difference this has made in my spirits...for the time it allows me to do other more fun (less stressful) things, not to mention the breather our grocery bill gets. I was buying a LOT of chocolate and specialty stuff in years past.

Sunday we spent the day trying something new...or at least something new for this time of year. A day of outdoor fun, complete with marshmallow toasting, and hot cocoa, and our favorite christmas music. We played "Pickle" and "Tag" and just enjoyed the day...thoroughly enjoyed it.

Completely "not in the plans," unscripted, good Christmas memories. Will it become tradition? Who knows. It was fun...and we all laughed out loud...especially little Anne who spent her first time "running" through the grass with big brothers and sisters, and yes...even Mom was running. We giggled till we all fell down.

God is good.

Peace and joy to you all this Advent and Christmas season.

welcome...

Great news! Today, I found my camera. Yes, there are still a few things misplaced, but I continue to chip away at boxes, and somedays are like Christmas opening up packages to find things I've been anxiously awaiting. This morning, it was my camera. Yipppeeee!


Hope you don't mind that I went a little overboard snapping away some pics to share of our new home. I should start by saying that every day here feels like we're living a dream. God was so generous in bringing this particular home into our lives. It's nearly 80 years old(ish), and yet feels as though it was made exactly for us. God is so good. I am still overwhelmed with a grateful heart...it's better than my wildest dreams.

So quaint, no?! Just love the curb appeal.

A view from the kitchen into the front sitting room...yes, sitting. I'm also in love with the glass door, even though I gasp every time little Anne slams it shut so she can press her little nose on it better.

Okay, not a necessary picture... but these are the chairs that had John very nervous when I ordered them. He's still not sold...but I LOVE them. My splash of color in an all "beige" room.

Off the back of the house is our family room with a ladder to the kids play loft. Very cool. (Wish I was a kid again.)


This is one of the things that I LOVE about our home...it's history...all the kids/grandkids that passed through these rooms before us...measured over time on the basement door. We added our list over there on the left.

Here's our coat closet...actually an old hallway that leads to the current apartment. Look at all those reminders of the blessings God gives...and his Providence. He does take care.



And the kitchen...with this huge picture window. I can see the window to the family room from here.

Here's the adorable window over my kitchen sink. Seriously...I'm in love. It makes little rainbows all over the kitchen in the morning sun. Reminds me He's smiling down on us. Oh, and see our Blessed Mother over there on the corner of the patio...all lit up at night as I do my evening kitchen clean-up. (sigh.)

Kitchen island...with kids busy benda-roo-ing. (In hindsight, I should have "staged" a prettier picture...but truly, this is our life...busy, beautiful. Who want's an empty "pretty" kitchen?!) This room is the heart of our home. Beyond the island is my laundry area. Hidden behind that wall...but constantly in use. So convenient. This might make some cringe to have laundry in the kitchen...but I LOVE it.

Standing at my kitchen sink, looking back towards the other half of the kitchen...room for another set of crafters at the table. Seriously?! Who am I to deserve this kitchen?! (yes, I am HIS...and He is so good.)
*Note...that wall beyond the kitchen table will (by spring) be busted out to make way to the apartment space that will become our great room. Only sad that I'll have to find a new place for "The Last Supper." I'll get over it though, and will surely find just the right spot.

Here I stand in the laundry area peaking around the other side of the island...see my new washer there in the corner. THANK YOU!


This little spot is above the computer armoire in the laundry area. Those are my grandmother's dishes she played with as a little girl. Love that I have the perfect place to display them.

And of course...the view I have while standing at my washing machine. Truly...this house was made for us, and our favorite things.

I still get all "verklempt" considering God's goodness. (verklempt! Remember Linda Richman skit on SNL?! Ha!)

"I will bless the Lord at all times, praise shall always be on my lips. My soul shall glory in the Lord, for he has been so good to me." - some nice church song, I can't think of now.

Frankly speaking.

Smack dab in the middle of mass last evening (for the Feast of the Immaculate Conception,) an argument took place. While singing, even!

All 13 of us crammed into our usual pew...right up front where the only distraction is, well, Anne. That's another story entirely. Frank was on my lap, and as usual during songs, I use his finger as my pointer for the words.

We sang "...and Holy is your name."
And Frank would get all huffy each time..."NO IT ISN'T, MOM!"
And I'd smile.
And we'd sing it again "and Holy is your name" ..."NO MOM, IT'S NOT!" (whispers getting a little louder each time around.)
And I'd smile.
Finally, he couldn't stand it..."STOP IT MOM. MY NAME IS FRANK!"
Yes. It is. (still smiling, relieved the song was over so we could stop the loud whispering.)

Our deepest fear.

I shared this quote (stolen from another blog) with a women's group in Russia recently. Lovely women. Very open and friendly and kind. (thank you for inviting me!) God (as He so brilliantly always does) placed it right under my nose just in time. It truly sums up what I believe to be true, and just don't have the words to say it so eloquently...

I believe credit goes to author Marianne Williamson in A Return to Love.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
Actually who are we not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.
And when we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."


Just brilliant, and empowering. Had to share. As if you all didn't have enough reason to let your light shine! Fear not, children of God...

Frank's word for the day.

Keeping in mind that he's only five...you can imagine how floored I was when out of nowhere he hit me with this one:

(seriously, completely out of the blue...I was probably cleaning up lunch or something trivial at the time.)

Frank: "Mom, do you know what compassion is?"
Me: (thinking about my grocery list or what to make for dinner, or some other distracting thing) Umm...know what what is?!
Frank: Comp-ash-ion...enunciating for his idiot mom who's clearly not listening.
Me: no...what.
Frank: Compassion is when someone has a sad face, and you go up to them to see what's the matter, and play with them if they're sad. That's compassion.
Me: (tearing up, and melting like butter...cause he's five, and he's my boy...all sweet and toothless, and talking about compassion.) uh.huh. That's right.

Hugging ensued...and he got all grossed out and ran away. But it was too late. My heart already melted.

He's gooooood.

Oh my...it's been such a long time.

For the first time since we moved, I sat down this evening with my little ones for a bedtime movie. It felt good...it felt like home. It's also the first night I've sat with a computer on my lap...feet up. Now that feels good too. Good to know the wireless connection reaches into the Sitting Room. (Did I mention we now have such a space?! With furniture even, so that I might do more than fall onto the carpet exhausted at the end of the day.) Yes. Sitting room. No tv. Just furniture is nice. Sitting with feet up on said furniture is even nicer.

We are finally settling in. Beginning to do normal family things that I didn't even realize how much I'd been missing...like snuggling with little ones on my lap for a movie. Sitting with them at the end of the day. Nice.

Finally boxes are diappearing ('cept in the garage), misplaced items are being placed again, light switches are not a mystery any longer (mostly.) Life as we love it has resumed.

Oh, there is still such a huge "to do" list...with many more boxes and bins of things I won't need till after the holidays needing sorted..."later". And the renovation of the attached apartment is underway. Our dreams of a great family room are becoming more real all the time. But with most of the work being done by family members, this means many crazy evenings and weekends ahead. Crazy is a word we're getting used to though. It's how we roll.

I apologize for my absence here on the blog. My silence is certainly not an indicator that I've had nothing to write about...only that it's taken me longer than I thought to settle in. Rather than writing, I've been praying. Praying for direction, and many "thank you GOd!" prayers, praying for our family, and for some folks who need prayers...and for some whom have touched my life in ways that can only be compensated with prayer. God is so good, and I have much to be grateful for.

Thank you all for your patience.

Look forward to more opportunities to sit in this here Sitting Room.