a few thoughts on Adoration

I hadn't been for awhile, so tonight I took the kids to church for Adoration. If you've been procrastinating like me, stop! If you've never been...go! It's great for the soul. Silence is golden, and allows us that time to just listen, pray, thank, praise, ask, or whatever it is that we need to do. Just being in His presence is enough. Oh, and the bonus...while I'm certain my kids didn't get through many prayers (as evidenced by their tugging at my shirt asking "Is it time to go yet?") I do love that they get to see a different, more peaceful side of their mom, and maybe it will make them want to find that peace some day too. Monkey see, monkey do.
Peace.

(oh, and pray for our priests while your there, if you think of it.)

shoe-shopping 101

Back to school...need new shoes! I'm always incredibly embarassed to take the kids in for new school shoes. This year was no different. It seems that their feet grow a full 2 or 3 sizes over the summer, leaving me feel like a real cad forcing my kids to wear too-tight shoes. Truth is, most of the summer they don't wear any. So, with coupons in hand, and stores advertising their "buy one get one half-price event" I loaded the 6 oldest into the van and headed for the mall. Halfway there I wondered if the kids put on clean socks, or heaven forbid, washed their feet. That question was easily answered later when we piled out of the van, and I spot one of the girls in grundgey flip-flops, Sam wearing his holey sneakers, and Emma wearing tennies without socks at all. As little John peeled off his shoes, sand actually fell out onto the floor. Great. Oh well, we forge on. In the shoe store, I can sense the fear in the saleswoman's eye as she asked "How many need measured today?"
"All of them," I answer, smiling and trying to be optimistic. We start an assembly line of removing shoes, putting on socks (turns out some of them thought to bring clean socks along, just didn't want to wear them), filling out stickers with their size written on them, and then sending each one in the direction of their size. I have to admit, this lady was the best I've ever seen...she must have had a large family herself, cause she handled the pressure well. And I love the idea of writing the shoe size on a sticker pressed firmly on their shirt. When fitting six kids at a time, the actual size verses the 1/2 size up you want to purchase all start to blur...Sam measures 3, needs a 3 1/2, Emma 1 1/2, needs a 2, Alice 2 1/2 needs, a 3, and on and on. The stickers were genious!!! Everyone found a shoe they liked, that fit well in no time at all. They quietly tried them on, helped their little sibs, and after making a final decision, took their little boxes and sat along the wall waiting for the others. It was the kind of peaceful organization that makes my heart sing. It was poetry in motion. Ahhh, God is good. I made my purchases, cashed in my coupons, and each of the kids carried their little bag out of the store like a line of ducks following mama. Now if only we would have stopped there. My brilliant idea to take this show further into the mall backfired in a major way. But I'm grateful for the few beautiful moments while they lasted.
Now wait till I bring in the other 4 next week. I can only hope things go half as smooth.

weekend recap

My apologies to those checking in. I've been neglecting the posts this weekend...too busy just living life. John left early Friday with 8 other family members for Alabama. His brother Phil was celebrating his retirement from the US Army after 24+ years of service. (Oh, and did I mention he's 50 now too!) The kids and I stayed behind, van-less. We had a very nice weekend though. With Frank and Rose's birthday, grandparents came for lunch on Friday. The kids and I walked to the park for a picnic supper later that day. They all enjoyed hunting for locust shells. I think they found more than 50. (Awesome!!!!) When we got home, we were visited by Rosie's godfather Jay, wife Jackie and newborn Luke. It was the first we'd met Luke, and I enjoyed holding him immensely. He's a solid little guy. I just love that newborn stage...wish it could last a little longer.
On Saturday...cleaning day as usual. For some reason, the kids worked incredibly well together...finishing their chores (and then some) in record time, and with no arguing. Thank God for small miracles every day! So, for a treat we walked to McDonalds after supper for some ice cream. Yumm. Thanks Grandpa S. for the birthday McD's gift certificates. It's fun for the kids to "pay" with their own "money." We stopped for a brief time at the park, and hunted interesting stones for our rock collections. Alice found one shaped like a heart which actually was pretty cool. We ended the night with baths for everyone, a visit from grandma and grandpa who started a campfire for us, and brought 'smores fixins. (And a corona light with lime for mommy...yeah!!) I have to admit, I missed John most for the end of day conversation that we share, so it was nice to have adults to talk to at the end of the day, to help fill that gap.
On Sunday we made it to church, and later had a nice brunch with Grandma. The oldest 3 kids were invited to a local parade with the neighbors. And more visitors. This time Frank's Godmother, Dena and husband "Chick" dropped by. Chick helped us to set up tents in the backyard in preparation for cousins that would be visiting later in the evening. Our New Albany family arrived later, John's sister Martha and her 5. What a fun time it is when they come. The kids all play so well together. Our Sam loves having boys his own age around to rough-house with. We made another campfire, and more toasted marshmallows. (No corona this time...had to keep my wits about me.) Their were 15 kids and 2 moms, and while it was a little loud at times, I enjoyed every minute of it!! I just love when company comes. The 5 oldest camped in the backyard, while the other 10 found beds in the house. It worked out perfect. John got in late, around 1:30 am after dropping off his other passengers. What a relief to have him home safe with us again. (Thank God for more answered prayers.)
That brings us to Monday morning, today. Our guest have just taken off for other visiting with grandparents, great-grandparents, etc. It feels like all the fun was just sucked right out of the house with them when they went...the kids are suddenly feeling the effects of their late-night, early-morning camp-out, and my coffee has not yet taken effect. A nap sounds really good. I think we'll just take it slow today. Hear about dads trip, maybe slip out to the mall for school shoe shopping, before classes start Wednesday. Hmmm.......can't believe summer's on it's way out for another year. If only it were the first monday of summer, and not the last...
God Bless!

it's time.

I've been thinking about it for nearly a year now, it's time. I've clipped the pacifiers for the 2 year olds. John's out of the house visiting family in Alabama, so there was no talking me out of it. Frank and Rose are "big kids" now, it's time to cut them off. Literally. I snipped the tip of their pacifiers tonight, and explained "they're broken, all gone." Nothing makes me crazier than seeing kids who have to take their pacifiers out to talk. But we were nearing that line, so today was the day. As Emma told me later, "That's just a BAD birthday present mom!" She was right, maybe I should have waited till tomorrow. Rose cried for about 10 minutes from her crib, and when I went in to reassure her, she just laid the broken Nuk on the table next to her crib and whimpered, shaking her head no. I felt bad for her really. It's helped her to sleep for 2 years now and in a flash it was gone. Frank on the other hand didn't make a peep, and when I went in to check on him, the pacifier was tossed to the floor like yesterday's news. I'm feeling a little sad that they're not my babies anymore. Just like their siblings before them, they're growing and becoming more independent each day. I must savor each phase for all I can, because it is just that...a passing phase, to be replaced by another. And soon, they're all grown.
I best go look at them one more time, and then off to bed I go. There's a good chance that I haven't heard the last of them yet tonight.

...and Happy Birthday Frank & Rosie!

Remembering those early days, and how much I loved you from the moment I saw you. I am a better person for knowing and loving you. Thank you God for these 2 blessings.

Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary

solemnity,
August 15th


Hail Mary, full of grace. The Lord is with thee. Blessed are thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.


It was only right that a body so pure that God could deign to become a man in it should not be touched by the corruption of the grave.
~ Alexander de Rouville, The Imitation of Mary

living the simple life

I just read somewhere yesterday (sorry if it's stolen from your website), that we must "learn to live simply, so that others might simply live." Wow. I'll be the first to admit that we here live the anti-green life. I choose for now to take the convenient route...paper plates, disposable diapers, cheap cleaning products that get the job done. My thoughts are wrapped around stretching the budget, and not saving mother earth. On that same note though, we have learned to make do, or do without. Emma (3rd grader) just got her first new backpack since preschool. (the shock, I know...same backpack for 4 years!) There was nothing wrong with the old one, and John will be recycling it for preschool this year. I had to laugh as she was "breaking in " her new one today. "Look mom! I think I can hold on to this one for a few years...it has a cell phone holder for when I get older." I smiled...as if! I'm guessing, the cell phone holder will be a great place to hold a pack of gum, or pair of sunglasses, not likely ever a cell phone.
But I can let her dream...

a look back at the younger versions of us...

Some how the time capsule was cracked open today. I caught the kids checking out our wedding video (from almost 14 years ago!) It was entertaining to watch their reactions to their much younger aunts and uncles, and wonder out loud why a lot of their cousins weren't there. ('cause they weren't born yet either.) At one point in the film, photos of John and I in our dating days played. Little Mary asked if we were "moms and dads" yet. Grace responded before I could with "Of course not silly...you can't have babies till after your married!" It made me grateful that they associate the blessing of family within the vocation for which it was intended. May God continue to bless our family, and yours.
Peace.

who's calling please?

No, really, I can't hear you. Who's calling please?
Emma's soccer coach called yesterday to give me the season-starting details, practice times, etc, and I was embarassed to have to ask her to repeat details multiple times. Not because I'm hard of hearing, but because our house is noisy. (an understatement) Nobody's hurt, there's no party, we're not watching an action-thriller on tv...it's just noisy. Oh, and you are all aware of the default feature built into children's brains, aren't you. When the phone rings, without fail, an interal alarm goes off in their little heads, and strange behavior occurs. From peaceful playtime, the phone ringing sets off the desire for snacks, the need to potty, an inclination to steal a toy they would typically have no interest in...and the list goes on. I've tried phoning friends or taking care of "phone business" during quiet times, and without fail all H*LL breaks loose. (pardon my french). But it's true. This is why you more than likely won't catch me making a social call during daylight hours. This doesn't mean I don't appreciate calls during the day...an adult voice (especially one not 'selling' something) is always a bright point of my day...so keep the calls coming. But please understand ahead of time...it's noisy here. Can you repeat that?

kisses missed, but not forgotten

John went in to work for a few hours today to catch up on paperwork. Alice caught him before he was out the door though. She grabbed his face and pulled him down closer to her, and kissed him goodbye. "That's for last night, cause you were shaving when I went to bed." He glanced over at me, and we shared a smile. I could sense his heart melting just then. The love of a child reminds me of how God also loves us. When I fail to seek Him out for my end of day prayers, he's there waiting for me to start a new day in His love.

Call me...

The kids came up with there own nicknames today. I had to write them down to keep track. (I mean really, I can barely get their real names straight on a good day, and now they've got new ones...jeesh!)

Alice...Angel
Emma...Beckham
Sam...Sosa
Grace...Princess
Mary...Buttercup
John...Bull Dozer
Charlie...Chuckles
Frank...Tank
Rose...Peanut
Lucy...LuLu Bird

I'm imagining a few of them as gangsters from the 30's or 40's, and praying these names will be forgotten by tomorrow. Although, as with any really great idea in our house, signs have been posted on every bed room door, making them as "official" as they can get. When they asked what they should call me, I made it clear that "Mom" would do just fine.

good "clean" fun?

When's the last time your feet got really dirty? I mean, like when we were kids, and spent the entire day outside barefoot. And at bedtime, we'd all sit on the edge of the tub and take turns washing our feet (cause it wasn't bath night.) We had our kids at the park tonight, and then to the baseball diamonds to say hi to a few classmates who had turned out for the annual alumni softball tournament. By the time we returned home, the kids were black from the knees down. So, in the tradition in which I was raised, I lined the kids up 3 at a time on the edge of the tub and scrubbed feet. Rosie was actually wearing pink toe-nail polish...which wasn't evident pre-soap. It made us both laugh as she "oooh"-ed at the sight of it again...like finding lost treasure. After feet, they took turns at the sink washing face and hands. It was much quicker than baths, I know now why our parents did it that way. Needless to say the ring around the tub was something to behold. Just imagine 90 dirty little piggies making their way through your tub in just a few minutes time. (Not 100, since Lucy stayed clean in her stroller.)
More precious memories of summer.

doggonit.

just typed a lovely post about all the wonderful things we've accomplished this summer. the trolls working the info. super-highway had other plans though, and it's gone forever. Too tired to retype it tonight, so you'll have to believe me when I say, time flies when you're havin' fun!!
Can you believe we have just one full week of summer vacation left before it's back to alarm clocks, homework, soccer schedules, and shorter days. I'm tired just thinking about it, and to look around my house right now...it's a good thing tomorrow's Saturday: Cleaning Day.
Good night, and God Bless!

profile of a miracle

Name: Rose Evelyn

age: nearly 2

eyes: sparkly blue

hair: curly blond

The thought of her upcoming birthday has me very sentimental today as I think back to the day of her birth, and what a miracle it is that she's here with us. Don't get me wrong, I consider each of my children a blessing and a miracle...God's creation. But her story is much different than the others, and I've wanted to put it in writing for sometime.

At about 36 weeks into my pregnancy with Frank and Rose, my doctor began ordering weekly testing at the hospital to measure their growth, and also to monitor their movement and reactivity. I didn't have this with any of the other 2 sets of twins, so I kind of felt it unnecessary this time around. At 36 weeks all was well, so when it came to 37 weeks, I tried to talk my doctor out of the tests. I felt great, was showing no signs of labor, and could feel the babies moving all the time. She was adamant though, so I went to the hospital as planned. It was a Wednesday, August 15th, the feast our Our Lady's Assumption, a perfect day for the divine intervention of our Blessed Mother.

I arrived at the hospital as scheduled for an ultrasound first. The babies measured quite large with Frank measuring about 3 pounds larger than Rose, but neither were small babies, so I wasn't worried. Next I headed upstairs to the OB department for the non-stress test. I was strapped with 2 belts holding fetal heart monitors and given a little button to press every time I felt a kick. The button made a little mark on the heart monitor print-out so the nurses were able to compare when a baby moved, and how their heartrate reacted to their movement. It was during this test that we discovered that little Rose, while she had a heartbeat, was not moving, or "reacting". They tried stimulating her by placing a loud buzzer on my belly, and even had me drink sugar-filled drinks to wake her up, but it was all ineffective. My doctor, who was just returning from vacation, so was not in her office as was typical for Wednesdays, was in the OB department instead and determined it was necessary for delivery right away. Her prescence at the hospital was just one more small piece of the series of miracles that occured that day.

I was moved into a labor/delivery room and started on pitocin to begin contractions. After several failed attempts to reach John at home, my mom and neighbor found him at the pool with the 7 kids...obviously neither of us had any inclination that this was to be "the day." He made it to the hospital with plenty of time to spare and about 2 hours later, Frank came into this world. A strong, healthy 8#7oz. baby boy. After his delivery, Rose's weak heart rate plummeted and her delivery became much more urgent. She arrived just moments later, white as a ghost, not breathing, and without a heart beat at all. She was lifeless. At this time, I became very aware of all the people that had gathered in the room. (Somehow, I was oblivious to them before, not sensing at all the seriousness of Rose's condition.) Our family doctor was there, an emergency room physician, a respiratory therapist and a whole entourage of nurses were present and waiting to do whatever they could to save this baby. And they wasted no time. They worked tirelessly for approximately 15 minutes doing chest compressions, intubating her, and providing breaths for her via an ambu bag. At one moment I saw a nurse listening to this tiny baby's chest with a stethescope and shaking her head as if to say she couldn't hear anything. Our good doctor kept working though, and soon her heart was beating again. She was put on a respirator, and brought immediately to the nursery for more care. I hadn't yet held her, or seen her face. But where there is faith there is hope. We prayed together for her life, and her health. I soon got word that she was stabilized and being prepared for transport to a hospital over an hour away that had a neonatal ICU. The nurses brought me to the nursery to hold her little hand and see her for the first time. She was very swollen, and looked like a baby doll, so pale. Baby Frank was there with her. The nurses thought that since she was stable for now, it would be good for them to be comforted by each other. I was glad for that. John's dad who is a Catholic Deacon, came to the hospital and gave her a blessing and said some prayers for her. I'm still so grateful for him coming there. It gave me peace in the midst of so much uncertainty.

It was the middle of the night when she was transported, so John visited with her the following day, and sent reports to me of her condition. It was hard not being there, and yet I had this beautiful healthy baby Frank who was a wonderful blessing and diversion. His immediate needs kept my mind from being totally consumed with worries of Rose so far away. I was forced to cast my anxiety on the Lord, and know that he would take care.

It was determined later, that sometime in my last 2-3 days of pregnancy, the placenta that gave nourishment to Rose in my womb had torn away causing a maternal-fetal bleed. This bleeding caused her to become very anemic, and caused her heart to work overtime to supply her frail body. The overworked, enlarged heart became inefficient, and caused the fluid buildup in her lungs and throughout her body. My doctor suspects that if Rose had not been delivered when she was, she would not be alive today. She discussed with me quite frankly, that she felt a certain divine intervention that day as well. And said she was grateful to be a part of it.

I was finally able to see her and hold her for the first time when I was discharged from the hospital Friday afternoon, 2 days later. She was still on the ventilator, and had various tubes and IV lines throughout her body. I sobbed when the nurse laid her bundled little body into my arms. It was at that moment that I was finally fully aware of the possibility of losing her. Seeing her helpless little body, and fully understanding how fragile life is. Prayers to our Blessed Mother continued throughout Rose's hospitalization, and miracles continued to occur. I asked Mary to be the mother for little Rose that I could not be, to help Rose to feel her prescence and comfort when I was unable to hold her or comfort her. I had made the difficult decision to stay at home with the other 8 children as much as possible, to allow my body to heal, to be there for newborn Frank and the others who desperately needed their mom to be present. I knew there was little I could do for Rose. Even holding her was not allowed in the early days of her hospitalization. So, I prayed our Heavenly Mother would care for her. John and I took turns making the drive every day, and visited her as much as we could. Each day she showed progress, weaning herself to different ventilators, until she needed no vent at all. Tests were done on her heart and brain to determine if any long-term damage had been done by the lack of oxygen she'd experienced. Everything came back clear. More miracles! And at about day 9 we were able to feed her first bottle. She drank less than a teaspoon, and I wanted to sing from the rooftops!! On her 10th day, it was my turn to visit. I arrived at the hospital to be greeted with smiles from the nurses and a "She's going home today!" I was in shock and disbelief as they had just told us the day before that we couldn't make homecoming plans for another week. She had met all of her goals to be able to come home, and in record time. The neonatologist visited that day, and in his own disbelief said the only thing keeping her there any longer was a lack for a ride home. I called John, got back in the van and drove the hour long drive back home with nothing but a smile and prayers of thanksgiving for the miracle of life we'd been given. We loaded up the whole family and a carseat for little Rosie and went to bring her home. Our only discharge instructions were to "take her home and love her" No follow up tests, no appointments, nothing. Clean bill of health, and no turning back. I believe with the exception of her well-child checkups, she's been back to the doctor twice now for the usual winter upper respiratory infections.

I am humbled by God's mercy and goodness, and ever grateful for a heavenly mother's love and intervention. God Bless Rose!

and then there are bad days.

Any chance I had for "Mom of the year" was stripped from my clutches yesterday. It was definitely one of those "bad" days. (Yes we have them here too.) I'm not sure where things went wrong. The day started nice enough. John was off work, and snuck out early to surprise us with donuts. (a real treat for sure!) We then had a lazy morning getting ready for a picnic lunch in the park. All good so far. We walked along the lake, fed the ducks, even skipped stones. When we got home the kids helped me shuck about 7 dozen ears of corn to get ready for freezing. Still good. But somewhere after nap time, things seemed to take a nose dive. John had to leave for a school bus recertification course/banquet, so we were on our own for supper. (clean out the fridge night...a little bit of everyone's favorites). I knew things were sour when I found myself screaming (and no that's not an exageration) for everyone to "just be quiet!" at the supper table. They were out of control, each one trying to talk louder than the next. I finally began just sending them away from the table one at a time, hoping for a little peace in the kitchen. Unfortunately, sending them out early, meant all their dishes were left behind as well. (They usually clear their own place.) Arrggg. More insanity. Four neighbor kids joined us for the evening which meant a little more chaos than usual...and more toys to put away later. Listening, playing nice, and cleaning up were nowhere in the kids vocabulary tonight. Which of course made me scream louder...I hate that about myself. I've learned over time to quit praying for peace in our home, rather peace within me, that I might be able to channel peace through our home. I'm very aware that without inner peace, we can't expect things to be peaceful around us. Anyhow, we managed to get 9 baths done (Lucy had hers earlier in the day) and toys cleaned up before John got home around 9. And somehow, a little cake and ice cream brought us all back together. Prayers and kisses to bed, and all is right with the world again. Thank God today is another day!

"Extended Boom Fork-Lift"

That would be E.B.F.L. for short. What does it have to do with anything? I have no idea. But for some reason as we drove home in the dark from a long, late baseball game (with 7 deliriously sleepy kids) this became the topic of conversation initiated by 7 year old Sam. The boys have been glued to a movie about all types of trucks and diggers lately, and apparently this is something Sam found interesting. He tried to explain in great detail to me how it works, what it does, etc. But in my simple mommy mind it sounded mostly like "blah, blah, blah, blah." I finally had to shush him, and ask him to explain to me tomorrow morning after a few cups of coffee had worked their magic. Apparently he thought I was joking, because he talked about it continuously for almost the entire hour-long drive home. Eventually I couldn't keep from giggling everytime he said it. Go ahead...say it outloud "Extended Boom Fork-Lift." Now repeat that 7,000 times. It starts to work on you, doesn't it. He and I were both giddy with EBFL by the time we got home. I can't wait till breakfast, so I can be the first to say it. I hope I catch him off guard. It'll make him laugh, and say "good one, mom!" I can hear it already.

By the way, the game was "Awesome" and the rain held off. Couldn't have been a nicer evening.

growing pains

It is a deep heavy sigh I breathe, as I realize that my "babies" are growing up. Our first two are nearing 9 and wanting a space of their own that doesn't include Barbie, dress-up gowns or Little People. That place is impossible to find in this house with 8 younger siblings who have no concept of personal space. So, in trying to keep the peace, they helped me to reorganize the basement and carve out a "big kids" niche with desks, chairs, music, and a few 'tween posters. (I'm not sure I like a pic of Zac Efron's belly button fur hanging right above where Alice is meant to be studying, but "he's so cute!") Anyhow, I still imagine the pair in diapers, gumming the tv remote or toddling along furniture. Before I know it, they'll be asking me for car keys, or worse yet permission to date. Maybe I'll tuck a little Polly Pocket in their top desk drawer, in secret hopes they'll stay young forever. After all, Alice promised me at the age of 3 that the only boy she'd ever kiss was Daddy, and she'd live with us forever! Oh, how today I feel like holding her to that! (maybe when the 'tweens turn to 'teens, it will seem easier to want to let go!)
For now, I must snap out of it...preparing to take the oldest 7 to a minor league baseball game tonight (3 youngest heading to grandma and grandpas for the evening.) Pray that the weather holds out...and a little prayer that grandma holds out too! thanks mom!






,

yummy!

the cake was a hit I think, and worthy of sharing the recipe. Hope you enjoy.

today I'm grateful...

...for garden goodies, and neighbors who share their bounty. This week, a wagon full of zucchini "free for the taking" showed up in the neighbors front yard. I jumped on the opportunity and seized 2 large ones. I'm finally getting around to shredding it tonight with the help of the oldest 3. Emma seems the most interested in helping, and the least likely to scrape her knuckles on the grater...making quick work in the kitchen. I'm trying a new recipe now for chocolate zucchini cake. I made 2 right off, one to keep and one to share (in the spirit of paying it forward). Mmmm, there's nothing better than chocolate except the smell of warm chocolate permeating from the oven. Can't wait to give it a try. Will pass on the recipe if it's a hit...which it's likely to be. Goodnight for now...it's back to the kitchen to clean and freeze some fresh blueberries thanks to b-i-l Charlie's b-i-l Charlie. (How's that for confusing?!)

God Bless!

I'm back!!!

Many thanks to my computer-guru, tech-savvy b-i-l Steve for assisting us in the researching, locating, and purchasing of a new 'puter...I'm back online. (Imagine glorious beams of light shining down from the heavens, organ pipes playing beautiful melodies, and I'm singing at the top of my lungs "Halleluiah!!!!!!" ) All is right with the world again, and our family shananigans will be spared from these keys no longer.
peace, and good night!
jamie