Tuesday, January 26, 2010

don't be hatin'!

I'm trying desperately to maintain my cool composure, and just breathe my way through the hatin' that's going on in this house, but it's becoming more difficult. Three year old Frank is going through a horrible phase of hating everything, especially me. Ouch.
I'm not exagerating when I say that he says "I hate...(fill in the blank)" a hundred times in a day. Most often it's "I hate you mom." Ouch. It does hurt.
Thing is, I know he doesn't hate me, he's just angry...about whatever. It's almost always over something simple like running out of his preferred breakfast cereal, asking him to pick up a toy, telling him it's nap time, or even calling him to the lunch table in the middle of something he's playing. Anything that doesn't fall into line with his plans for that moment. I know it's just a phase. I know that. And I keep telling myself, if I remain calm, and not "react" to it, it will probably pass sooner than later. But boy, it's getting harder and harder not to take it personal and not to react. I have recently resorted to walking him to his room for a time out when he uses it repeatedly. I'm not sure that's gonna work either, but while I don't want to give him a reaction, I also want him to be aware it's not okay, and it's hurtful.
Geesh. Who could have guessed that each child could be so completely different with a whole new set of unique behavior challenges. What one doesn't think of...
Thank goodness for every "I hate..." I hear in a day's time, I see a smile, or hear a giggle, or find him snuggling on my lap during a book or movie. Today we built Legos together,and he was my "helper" in the kitchen making snickerdoodles (something he loves to do, but told all the big kids later he "hated.") He and twin Rosie shared my lap for a snuggle before bedtime tonight. It's all good. If we can just stop the hatin!

Please pray this passes soon.


Anonymous said...

in this picture he reminds me of dennis the menace and it sounds kind of like he's acting like one! I'm sure it will pass soon just hang in there!

jamie said...

definitely a dennis the menace type! All boy, all mischeif! thanks for the laugh (and the support.)

Jannis said...

My son (now 23) use to do the same thing, at about the same age. I finally came up with the idea that everytime he told me he hated me, I would reply well I love you. Looking back it prablably just made me feel better, but the I hate you became a memory! Good Luck