Tuesday, June 7, 2011

in case I forget to remember...

Days are blowing by at lightning speed.

I try not to blink...and yet I find myself waking up in the morning and wondering who stole those days away. Those days when there were only babies, or only toddlers in this house. Now there are 'tweens... wonderful and awkward all at once as we all adapt to changes that "growing up" brings.

Anyhow, with each new stage of Anne's baby-hood, I can't believe how much I forgot to remember ten times before.

I love the workings of her tiny hands. Amazing. Those tiny matchstick-size fingers working to pick up a cheerio, only to drop it just before it hits her lips. Mesmerizing.
I love when she stops just to stare at them too. Busy grasping a toy, or reaching out, when her eyes lock-in on the hands...and just stare intently as she wiggles chubby fingers back and forth. Truly a miracle of creation.
I love the way she sucks air and squeals when she hears my voice first thing in the morning...or when she sees me sneak from around a corner into the room.
I love when her rice cereal hangs on her toothless gums and appears as if she's wearing baby dentures at breakfast...just a glimpse of what it might look for her to have a full set of teeth someday. Funny.
I love the fine fuzz of hair on her naked shoulders.
I love the way her toes grip my upper lip when I kiss the bottoms of her soft padded feet.
I love the way she likes to sit on my forearm, her back against my belly, my other arm holding her belly from falling forward...all the while kicking her legs wildly as if dangling them off the edge of a dock into the water.
I love bathtime...because she does too. Splashing wildly and giggling outloud in the water. Fussing only when it's time to get out. My little fish.
I love the way her ear leaves a perfect imprint on my arm for long after she's done nursing...like angel kisses, a reminder of our special bond.
I love wrinkled-nose, squinty-eyed silly faces.
I love those first days of learning to crawl, when everything goes backwards, and legs find themselves wedged under couches...and she gets so frustrated. But she's learning and growing.
I love how the other kids melt like butta' around her...even grumpy brothers can't bare to walk by you without a hug, or silly face, or tickle. Babies shine with Christ's light.
I love how she can fall asleep on Daddy's shoulder at the drop of a hat...though she's never done that for me. He's had that "touch" with all of the kids...perhaps God's gift to Daddys.
I love the end of the day, when I nurse her into a sleepy little coma in my arms, and she smiles with eyes squinty closed. Because everything in that moment is right with the world. And in that moment she reminds me how much God loves me...and how good He is.
I love the way she makes my heart weaker, and stronger all at once...prepared to love more, and hurt more.
I love you Anne. Uniquely. And yet in the same way I've loved each of your siblings before you.
This time though...I'm writing it down, so I don't forget to remember.